I hate your face
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
