so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
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