That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize