Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize