erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
