it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Randomize
