In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
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