She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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