Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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