This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I'm passing your future prison.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
