whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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