Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
