Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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