There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
