Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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