Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I'm too high and old for this...
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
