just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize