Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
