what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
