God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
worst night to have a conscience
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
