nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
