trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Ketchup is God's man juice
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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