Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
