If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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