he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize