Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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