The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
