Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
