i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
you never un-have a 4some
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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