She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I need a beard to bite.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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