Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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