I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
