areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
