ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
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