i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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