So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
