You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize