you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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