pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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