I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize