I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize