dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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