You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
