You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
