i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
