dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize