Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just gift wrapped bread.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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