he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
