U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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