All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize
