The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize