glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
